I’m Sick Of Manchester United

Jose Mourinho to give Man Utd star frozen out by Ole Gunnar Solskjaer second shot at Roma | Football | Sport | Express.co.uk

Gotcha. I love this club as one of the only constants in my life, but in every joke there’s a modicum of truth and honesty that makes it funny and relatable. There is a new dawn approaching Manchester United, but just what will become of the ETH era? Since I’m a self-proclaimed optimistic cynic, I’ll tell you the stuff I am weary of as we move into the summer period.

United and Fan Accounts*

I am extremely over the hopelessly positive spins from fan accounts who seem to forget the past 10 years of mediocrity. I can no longer stomach the bullshit spewed through the official United Twitter account. Every day United has at multiple new posts across all platforms trying to trick fans into thinking the operations team actually cares about the club. Its mind numbing every day to see all of this content pushed out while the club is so clearly in disarray; it feels intentionally misleading. Can’t wait to see how they spin a lifeless 0-1 loss to Crystal Palace in a positive light. Sure, I’m still going to like every post they put out, but believe me, I don’t want to be liking them.

*Note: This excludes the ARD fam. I’ll go to war for my blog-fathers.

United Journalists and NBCLFCMCFC

I’m at the point where I hate-read everything Mark Goldbridge or Liam Canning post or tweet. They have to be the most bipolar journalists the world knows. Either one goal from Cristiano solves all United’s problems, or a 0-1 loss means Old Trafford has never seen such a lifeless performance. Their agenda is completely unknown and maybe they just want to be heard because they were bullied as kids when they were home-schooled. Whatever their issue is, I can’t stop reading everything they post, and can’t help but feel they are conversationally annoying. I would link their twitter accounts, but I care about my readers’ mental health.

I don’t think much commentary is needed about NBCLFCMCFC. They are the worst. I will grant most United games have felt like devoid of creativity or structure, but do I really need to hear it constantly? Do I really need to hear how Liverpool can win every trophy to ever exist this season while they are not the favorite to win most of them? Maybe I’m just bitter cause United suck this past year.

General Optimism

Yea, I know I sound like an old man yelling from his soap box, but this season has deprived me of all hope. Fans really are just going to replay the hits like there is no evidence of things going wrong the last 10 years. Do you really love ETH, or do you love what he represents? Is he really the savior twitter accounts have already anointed him as, or is he another manager with big aspirations whose hopes and dreams will come crashing down after a couple seasons? I’m just saying brace yourselves because, there is no recent historical evidence to support the former idea.

Anecdotally, I actually think ETH can be a good manager, but a manager is only as good as the support around him. Everyone seems to know United need a complete reset except the C-suite and board who did this to United in the first place. Its a popular definition, but I’ll reiterate it because it feels more relevant than ever. Insanity – doing the same thing every single time, but hopelessly expecting the outcome will be different the next time.

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Here’s to looking forward to another campaign of insanity. GGMU.

About JR 64 Articles
A glimpse inside the mind of an over-reactionary, over-invested, and highly-sarcastic American Red Devil. P.S. I'm not here to argue.

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